2013年5月29日水曜日

Am I just a " Girl, Interrupted " ?

" Have you ever confused a dream with life ? 
現実と夢の狭間がなくなる感じがしたことがある?

Or stolen something when you have the cash ?
お金を持ってるのに、万引きしたり

Have you ever been blue ?
落ち込んだり

Or thought your train moving while sitting still ?
じっと座っているにもかかわらず、電車が動いているように想ったり

Maybe I was just crazy..
わたしはただ頭がおかしいかったのかもしれない。。

Maybe it was the 60s(80s)..
それは60(80)年代だったせいなのかもしれない。。

Maybe I'm just a girl, interrupted..
それとも私はただ空想壁のある障害を持った”つまずいてしまった”女の子なのかもしれない・・ "

(from " Girl, Interrupted "映画「17歳のカルテ」より 
* with my own translation in Japanese. )


Simon & Garfunkel "Bookends"

Slowly fades away.. ~ into my " Crystal Days "..~

Slowly fades away...
and it starts moving..
"Your" scenery becomes mine.
Your words just invite me to my past,
the past which never really appeared but now it is clearly seen..

Scenery in me becomes yours, into your stories..
then I start rewinding my story with your songs, with my own words..

" Where am I now ? "

" In the deep woods of the people who knows tomorrow.. "
You said with your words, inviting into deep in the unknown forest inside of me.

" Let me know where to go.."

Then I follow your indication .. without fear.. - Cause I know who you are..-


現実と幻想の狭間がなくなる時
”あなた”は自分の詞で、わたしを”誘う”
”あなた”の森の中に、わたしは呼びこまれる
”答えは明日を知る者の森の中にある・・”と。
そして私は”旅”を始める
自分の中にある”森”の中へ
そして”あなた”に道先案内を頼む
”あなた”の事は知っているから、ちょっと迷っても怖くないと・・
一緒について来て貰えるように、その曲を携えながら・・



私の中にある”森”の奥深くへと・・Slowly fades away.. with that song..

Into my "Chrystal Days"..



”途切れたままの記憶の欠片”を探しに行っている”わたし”に。。
I'm just on the way to collect pieces of me in which I have left behind within my memories..


(* Original words in Japanese for this song by "Gazelle"from a Japanese band,called "Asylum", the one I use to listen when I was at teen age..

- Now I put the English translation of this song, because I believe his original words are so beautiful, and I want to express in English, too. -

Original lylics:

”貴方はまだ波間で眠る光
通り掛る想い出は夢の途中

貴方の見た想い出は昨日の彼方
明日を知る者達の森の中

 小さな白い手を差し延べて
宙に舞う悲しみは貴方の
途切れたままの記憶の欠片
貴方はまだ旅の途中...”
 
Translation with my own interpretation..

" You are only just a light which sleeps in between waves.
Memories which pass by is in the middle of the dream.

Your memories which were seen is far beyond yesterday.
In the middle of the woods of people who know tomorrow.

Reaching out your small white hands,
The sorrow floating in space is
a piece of your memories which have been broken up.
You are still in the middle of your journey.. ")

- I sing along this song with my own translation, I guess, it works :) -

"All the stories here are dedicated to my "Crystal Days", 
as fragile as Crystal inside my infancy and adolescence"

Time goes back and forward..

Time goes back and forward inside of me..
The scenery jumps into my past holding to the presence.

I don't know if I'm crazy, or just, it happens to be in me..
However, "It"begun just like this..

It slowly fades away, and the scenery in the presence turns into my "Past".
and the presence becomes my past which existed certainly 25 years ago.
I start hearing your voice and seeing your appearance at the same place we met just about 25 years ago.. in Tennoji, at the staircase of the walking bridge which has been renewed and it fades away in the past..

In the spring wind, makes me feel like as if I was there.. I can feel the slight ephemeral spring smell in the air,, just like 25 years ago..

A tender spring breeze touches my cheek, lingering my ears and going through me gently..

Now I'm in the spring haze, with you, on the bed of cherry blossom petals, and the petals were flowing around us as if it was a gentle spring 花吹雪。



I know you are not there any more, however we spent a night and feel happily on the bed, smiling at each others, in the tender morning light..

Then I slowly wake up.. within my spring dream

- I know we can only meet when the Sun crosses the Moon, we live on the opposite side, even the physical distance is so close.. We can't see each others in real world any more.. -

1st of April 2013.. ”なにか”がまた始まる、”わたしの中”で・・

また今度は4月1日からとても”不思議”な夢に纏わりつかれ、そのthoughtが自分から離れなくなってしまった。

時は逆流する、ものすごい速さで、そしてそれは自分のコントロールできる速さではなく、25年前の”私とあなた” に大逆流して、出逢った”その日”からまたその”物語り”は紡ぎ直される・・
そしていつしか”現実”はその場所に行った時からその時の”場面”と重なって、再び私達は”出逢う”のだけど、いつしかそれは、”私とあなた”の両方の感情が初めて入り交ざり、”本当にこれは私なのか?”どうかわからない程、自分の感情がまるで消えていくかのように、まったく昔と同じ場面なのに、あなたの気持ちのようなものが入って来る・・ そしてその時の”音楽”が流れてきて、まるで私の聴いてことない、もしくは今までなんとも想わなかった”音楽”が流れ出して、私の中でその歌詞を唄いながら、”泣いている”のだ。 「私は一体誰なの?」って。支配された気持ちが自分のものではないことを、また再度確認しながら、その”気持ち”と自分の気持ちを分けて考えるようにしたら、かなり楽になった。

まるで「confession」のように、”彼”の気持ちを子守唄のように聴くことにしたら、大分と楽になって来た、「ああ、そうか、そうだったのか・・」って。ごめん、今まで一度もそんな事考えたことなくて・・あなた側の気持ちなんて・・


”さくら”の舞う季節の中で、わたし達はまた再び夢の中で出逢った・・



”それ”は、春の儚い夢となり、私の中で蠢き始める・・

そしていつしか”物語り”は再びまた始まった・・”わたしの中”で ”過去”を見直しながら。。

2011年10月28日金曜日

A man with a dog outside Monoprix

A man with a dog outside supermarket Monoprix in Nice.

He was always with an old white dog.
She was nearly "gray" instead of her real colour.
She was always sitting next to him on a comfortable mattress.

He was always sitting directly on the street
with one knee raised & other on the ground.

She was always calm looking at him like his mother
with her tongue coming out from in between her left teeth.
White old maltese.

When it rains, he put an umbrella over her,
He never had an umbrella for himself.
It makes people have a warm feeling. - makes smile -

People start talk about him
A man outside Monoprix with an old white dog
They are saying " She is adorable ."

People talk to him, how the dog is, how his life is.
He looks so comfortable and people give him more money
sometime whole packet of biscuits for his dog  .

He is there always from Monday to Saturday,
while the shop is open
like his reserved place
He was always there.

Once I was walking through Rue Massena on Sunday.
I saw him on the corner on the street.
He's somewhere else also on Sunday,
like going to work everyday.

One day, the dog was not there,
next day as well.
People started worrying, and asked him where she was gone.

He said "She's gone."

People feel sorry for him.
She was only company for him like a family.

However, a week later he's got a new dog already.
It makes people surprised, wondering how quickly he could get over.

The new dog was much younger than the other dog,
but he/she had a white curly hair like a little poodle.

He goes back to work like nothing terrible happened.
I wonder "Is he not too sad about loosing other dog ?"

He seems happy with the dog again at least.
Maybe it is more important thing for him.

He was always there with the dog again,
when it's sunny, when it's rainy, when the cold arrives the city..

One year had passed,
I came back to Nice again in September from my long absence in summer.
I went to the supermarket to buy things I needed.

The dog wasn't there any more.
The man was there, begging money.
However, he looks much older and weary.
Now nobody talk to him anymore.

Now he looks just like other begger on the street.
People talked to him, because he was a man who was taking care of the little dog like a family.
However, now nobody cares or give him money anymore.

Now he's all alone.
The dog might have gone somewhere or he might abandoned it.
Nobody knows.

He might abandoned the dog in order to stay at a public shelter for homeless people
where they don't accept people with animals.
Nobody know the truth.
Now finally he lost a family,
and people ignore his existence.

A man without a dog.
He has lost maybe something the most important in his life..


2011年10月16日日曜日

Falling America, Crashing America..


"Shitloads of money  by Liz Phair  "

Louis is probably thirty years old but he looks like a solid 45 
Louis says he’s got a headache 
I look in his eyes, and I believe him

The big l.k.’s and the gangster disciples 
Louis can’t think of who else could take over 
But he just can’t get up in the morning 
 A genuine face, braced for survival

It’s nice to be liked 
But it’s better by far to get paid 
I know that most of the friends that I have 
Don’t really see it that way

But if you can give ’em each one wish 
How much do you wanna bet? 
They’d which success for themselves and their friends
And that would include lots of money

Don’t know how many times you were stuck in the morning 
You just couldn’t move, though you mother was calling 
You know what you need is a lotto revival 
 A train flashes by and you’re lost in a spiral

It’s nice to be liked
But it’s better by far to get paid 
I know that most of the friends that I have 
Don’t really see it that way 

But if you can give ’em each one wish 
How much do you wanna bet? 
They’d which success for themselves and their friends 
And that would include lots of money 

Take the train on up to the zoo 
Don’t look back on what you’ve been through 
Cause everyone’s got a monday
It looks like sh*t and must be America 
It burns so quick, and it must be America 

It’s nice to be liked 
But it’s better by far to get paid 
I know that most of the friends that 
I have Don’t really see it that way

But if you can give ’em each one wish 
How much do you wanna bet? 
They’d which success for themselves and their friends 
And that would include lots of money 
I would surely include lots of money

You’ve got to have shitloads of m-o-n-e-y, money
 

 
Original Version " Money by Girlysound " is more direct

Elvis (?) is probably 30 years old
 He looks like a Saab in '45
Cliff says he's got a headache

 Looks like sh*t and it feels like America
 Looks like sh*t and it feels like America

 Take them (?) back inside
 (?) think of something else to take over
 But you just stand it up and warning

 Looks like sh*t and it feels like America
 Looks like sh*t and it feels like America

 Why fly when you can walk
 Why sing when you can talk
 Why hit the wall when you've just punched the clock
 Oh why sing when you can talk

 Jeremy's talking about the bombs
 He's thinks it probably a bad place to be
 It's gonna be worse than Manhattan

 Looks like sh*t and it feels like America
 Looks like sh*t and it feels like America

 Take the train on up to the zoo
 Don't look back on what you've been through
 Cause everyone's got a Monday

 Looks like sh*t and it feels like America
 Looks like sh*t and it feels like America

 It's nice to be liked
 But it's better by far to get paid
 I know that most of the friends that I have
 Don't really see it that way

 But if you could give em each one wish
 How much do you wanna bet
 They'd wish success for themselves and their friends
 And that would include lots of money
 That would surely include lots of money

 So if there are any of you little green elves
 Sitting out there today
 Step right up wish me old Irish luck
 But I also need shitloads of money

 And if there any of you dirty rich old men
 Sitting out there today
 Step right up I'm your lucky f**k
 But I'm gonna need shitloads of money
 I'm gonna need shitloads of money
 I'm got to have shitloads of money
 
 
☆☆☆

FALLING AMERICA, CRASHING AMERICA in October 2011..

☆☆☆ 
  
 
In Mr VERTIGO -Paul Auster-says;
 
" That was in 1927, 
the year of Babe Ruth and Charles Lindbergh,
the precise year when night began to fall on the world forever.
I kept it up until a few days before the October Crash"

That was when an orphan Walter learned how to fly from Mr Yehudi.
 
☆☆☆☆
 
Occupy Wall Street demonstration on Brooklyn Bridge on 2nd Oct 2011
"700 protesters were arrested" 
- 03/10/2011 International Herald Tribune-  
 
"Occupy Wall Street" demonstration never ends in Manhattan,
It even spreads out worldwide.
People are not happy about current situation
that only 1 % of world population monopolize prosperity, 
equal to 40% of the total wealth. 

That's why a dog of financial monsters call them "mobs"
not different from riot in London - which was totally different -
Even peaceful demonstration against capitalism is called in that way by "the Power"
Like "Americans against Americans"

How medias can be watch dogs for these people?
Who will win this movement?
They need a war to get recovered.
but as long as Obama is in power,
it is impossible.

So will people chose "Peace in poverty"
or " Getting into war for more profit"?

Are they so stupid, Americans ?

I think to crush this unequal financial system,
-and total control by American Intelligence-
in order to get real freedom and a new discipline,
we need to CRUSH AMERICA !!!

2011年10月6日木曜日

Blue Valentine..



 

He fell in love with her.
It was a love at first sight.

He was traveling through South America.
He went back to the country where he first met her,
just to find her.

He stayed there for 6 months
just to be by her side
learning their language
till his dream came true.

She was an artist,
a painter.
She was free, young and beautiful.
She was from a wealthy family in that country.

Then she finally accepted him,
who was saying 
" I'm going to be a rich man, I'll give anything you want. I'll do anything for you."

Then they went to Europe and got married.
He worked harder working as an engineer who was searching petrol around the world 
in the one of the wealthiest country, Monaco.

They had a family and looked the happiest of all.
with two beautiful girls.
They had a new family house, not every one can get although they dream of.

However, she grew unhappier and unhappier.
Then one day, she asked herself "Do I really love him?"
 "There is nothing to complain about"
however, a shadow on her face grows each time seen.

Biennale in Venice.
It was the last time I saw them together.
Then suddenly our contact went missing.
She was not on facebook anymore..

                        - They must spent Blue Valentine together here in France.. -





Then, one day I found her again.
She said she separated with him, 
with even happier face in photo back in her country,
which I never saw her like this here before.

She was once saying to me 
"Every one of my friends is leaving here, because they are unhappy here in France."
I guess you're right, you showed it to me as it was true.

I don't know what she's doing now.
All I know is she is in Houston leaning English, stays with someone else.
If you are happy, I'm happy for you wherever you are... Valentina

Blue Valentine, Blue Valentine
like in that movie..
Where are you now, my friend ?

After 7 years of marriage,
and she's gone..